How To Get Rid of the Valentine’s Day Blues

By Karen Friday

When February 14th comes near, I hear people say, “I’m skipping Valentine’s Day this year!” Heart-broken or disenchanted with the whole “will you be my valentine?” charm or its absence.

As a young and vulnerable heart, Valentine’s Day without a boyfriend seemed ghastly to me. The Valentine’s Day blues at its peak (a girl in love with love).

Why do we think being someone’s valentine defines us? At least thinking it’s the tell-tale sign of who we are in regards to having and owning love. Like the cliche’: “I’m lucky in love.”

For the security of celebrating the day-of-love holiday, I often see girls and women date someone who is not their “first pick” until the holiday is over. Guys do this too. Settle. To have someone fill the spot for grandiose images of candlelight, romance, flowers, and chocolate.

I’ve always wanted close relationships with people who really “get me.” To know my heart as much as a person can know another human heart. Do they know what makes me smile, moves me to tears, causes me to laugh out loud, brings me to sadness, or throws me into a tizzy? To understand me and love me. For. Me. As. Me.

3 valentines I always wanted to be:

• The daughter valentine. To be my father’s little girl, then his big girl. His sweetheart as a child and woman dear to his heart.
• The friend valentine. To be the sweetheart next door. Known as the small town girl who is sweet, kind, and loving. Young school days of passing out valentines to all my classmates transferring into those yearbook signing days of “to a sweet girl.”
• The girlfriend valentine. To be picked as the sweetheart of someone in school, especially middle school and beyond—“Will you be my valentine? Will you be mine?” One day in college, a boy asked me to be his valentine forever; thirty years later, I am still Mike’s sweetheart. (Pictured above, we are on a Valentine’s trip in 2014.)

Do you have the valentine blues? Are you valentine-less this year? Boyfriend-less, girlfriend-less, marriage-less, or in any relationship that is love-less? Perhaps you are in a marriage with so much “less” than before—sweethearts that have drifted apart.

Even on non-valentine days (any day of the year besides February 14), I have felt loveless. The pit of my heart was dark, deep, and empty of love. This, my friends, is a sad condition on any day. Any.

Valentine’s Day—the day of love—can be a jubilant celebration regardless of whether you have secured a valentine date, dance, dinner, or the love of your life. No need to totally skip out on the holiday. Cupid loaded with his bow and arrows is not necessary.

Cupid’s bow and arrows have always missed the bullseye. His make-believe persona and pretentious match-making are stray arrows that never hit dead center the target of real love.

My heart has been pierced with an arrow of enduring love that Cupid knows nothing about. The piercing love of someone who really “gets me.” Who understands me and loves me. For. Me. As. Me. One who asked me to be his. He promised he would hold me dear to his heart forever.

He pursued me with a proposal, “will you be mine?” Accepting his invitation, I instantly became his daughter, friend, and sweet to his heart. Completely loved and never loveless again. The valentine I always wanted to be. God’s. It “beats the socks off” the Valentine’s Day blues, transferring real love into my other relationships.

When God drew back his bow, he hit dead center the target of real love. Jesus’ heart was pierced for me. And you. On the cross. A day of love. The greatest Valentine’s Day and love story ever told. Ever.

Jesus is calling, “Will you be mine?”

“Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.” John 15:13 ESV

© 2015 by Karen Friday