Marking Mother’s Day This Year

I’m so honored to have my Literary Agent, Blythe, and her mother, Helen, as guests. I met both of these lovely and godly women at a writers conference. Their book, Mended: Restoring the Hearts of Mothers and Daughters, spoke to my heart as both a mother and daughter. Their message is sure to touch you as we set our hearts on marking Mother’s Day this year.

By Dr. Helen McIntosh and Blythe Daniel 

As daughters and perhaps mothers, I would imagine you’ve had your heart broken a few times. Things were said that shouldn’t have been shared.

Maybe even now it’s still difficult to talk with your mother or daughter. And then there is a marked holiday that puts the status of your relationship in front of you, right?

Always before a holiday or special event it’s especially important to guard our hearts. Many of us are prone to have expectations–that’s normal and natural–but a handful of expectations leads to disappointment and control. We simply want to control how things go. 

So, as Mother’s Day comes, how do you want to mark this day? Will it be to stay as busy as possible so as not to think about your disappointment from a mother or daughter? Do you expect that she won’t call or send a card?

Marking By Letting Go

Would you consider letting go of your hopes for the day? 

Certainly we hope it’s an exquisite day from your loved ones, but what if there is disappointment from a mom or daughter? 

It’s important to think ahead of how you will handle it. Can your purpose in your heart how you will look not just at this day, but the coming days ahead with her?

How to Center Our Marriage Love in Jesus’ Love

Dear Wife,

When we center the love for our husband in our love for Jesus, it deepens our love as a couple.

My love story with Christ began when I was sixteen as I gave my life and heart to Jesus. What a sweet love for sweet sixteen! 

Furthermore, my love story with my husband, Mike, began when I was twenty on a college campus. We were in a sociology class together, Marriage and Family. I know—crazy! 

So, the professor gave students an opportunity to earn extra credit by attending an event on relationships and writing a paper.

And it was at this event, sponsored by Campus Crusade for Christ, where I shared my love story in Christ.

After class, I heard a male voice behind me calling, “Hey!” Then I turned around to the cutest guy who said he enjoyed my testimony. I still joke with Mike about his Christian “one-liner” hoping to date me. But I was thankful he had his own love story with Jesus.

We became fast friends, dated for three years, and reached a milestone this year of thirty-four years of marriage.

Center Our Love Story In Our Jesus Story

If a love story is what we claim to be the overall picture of marriage—how we fell in love and why we fell in love and why we are still in love. Then what better way to keep our love story anchored and strong and stable than to center it around our love story in Jesus Christ. 

How to Let Empty Refine Us and Not Define Us

“I’m sorry, there’s no heartbeat.” 

My heart skipped a beat. A miscarriage landed me in the bed with low back pain and abdominal discomfort. The same as birth bangs when my daughter was born. Except there’s no baby to hold or name or take home. 

The doctor described this three-day nightmare as a natural way the ten-week-old fetus continued to exit my body. He even said this was the best case scenario to avoid a medical procedure to clear anything left behind. But I just cared about what had happened to my unborn baby and the unseen scars left behind. 

My womb not only emptied itself of the baby I dreamt would be our second child, but I also felt an undeniable emptiness—a hollow space with an echo of loss.

Months after, my empty womb threatened to rob my joy as a woman and as a mother. Sadness crept in while explaining it to my two-year-old daughter every time she asked, “Is the baby in your tummy, Mommy?” Even telling my co-workers and friends seemed daunting. And the waiting period before attempting another pregnancy seemed like forever. 

Shed Prison Clothes and Dine at the King’s Table

Neither prison itself nor the clothes prisoners must sport appeal to this girl. And no doubt the entire experience proves undesirable. 

Like confinement to a small space, lack of freedom, prison food or no food, missing my family and friends, and dreaming of a future.

Likewise, Jeremiah 52 recounts this kind of story with an evil king of Jerusalem, Zedekiah, who rebelled against God, and also rebelled against the king of Babylon, Nebuchadnezzar (don’t see those names listed in baby-name books).

So, as a result, Nebuchadnezzar sieged Jerusalem; its king, city, and people fell to this utter destruction and despair:

• Imprisoned King Zedekiah until his death.
• Burned down houses and the house of the Lord.
• Broke down all the walls of Jerusalem.
• Plundered items from the temple.
• Killed the chief priest, keepers of the threshold, and men from the king’s council.
• Took thousands of captives from Jerusalem as exiles to Babylon (seventh and eighteenth years of Nebuchadnezzar’s reign). Then, hundreds of captives from Judah (twenty-third year of his reign).

Yet, when we arrive at the final four verses of this last chapter of Jeremiah, we meet Jehoiachin, king of Judah. Exiled to Babylon and imprisoned when he was a young (Matthew Henry Commentary suggests at eighteen-years-old).

Captivity Turned to Freedom

But here’s the rest of the story in God’s Word when despair turned to joy, and captivity turned to freedom. It’s also my story.

3 Ways to Awaken Courage: Your True Self

By Lisa Murray

The truth is, sometimes I’m not fine. There are moments my day hasn’t gone great, and yes, some days the weather really does stink.  

That’s what I want to say at least, but I rarely do.

How about you?

There are a lot of things about me I don’t say, many truths I keep tucked inside, hidden in the bottom drawer of my heart, for fear others wouldn’t want to hear about what’s really going on with me. 

Somehow I believe if I let them see the real me, they might think I’m crazy, too much to handle. Or they might just reject me altogether.

Courage To Your True Self

So I’ve learned to edit myself. If we’re honest, I think most of us edit ourselves. We’ve learned to do a fair job stitching together the prettiest sides of ourselves to show people while keeping the worn and ragged edges hidden out of sight. We pray no one will notice and try to convince ourselves our patchwork looks as good as new. As long as no one gets too close.  

Up close is where the reality of our threadbare and disheveled selves might poke through. Where the tears, the insecurities, the pockets full of unworthiness spill their ugly selves onto our identity. It isn’t pretty.

The problem is, all the years I hid my truest self, all the years I kept everyone at arm’s length, I also kept the beauty of intimacy and vulnerability from ever reaching my impenetrable, fear-filled heart. 

Marriage Math: How 2 Become 1

Welcome to Marriage Math Class.

In school, I sometimes struggled in math. I mastered basic arithmetic. And as an abstract thinker, I soared in Geometry. 

Yet, theorems of Algebra threw me for a loop. I wondered if any of it applied in a practical way to life.

So for this article, let’s stick with the basics. 

What’s the only way two of anything becomes one? We take one away. Right? Two take away one equals one, (2-1=1). In mathematics, it works with apples or dogs or numbers.

And Scripture sheds a bright light on the concept in marriage. 

“The two will become one. So they are no longer two, but one” Mark 10:8 NLV.

You see, God’s teaching on marriage shows the answer always equals one. Unified for one purpose paints a picture of the bride of Christ, the church. Jesus taught His followers to be one as He and the Father are one. 

Then, how does this happen in marriage?

2 Become 1 

First, we need to jump back to the preceding verses. “From the beginning of the world, God made them man and woman. Because of this, a man is to leave his father and mother and is to live with his wife. The two will become one” Mark 10:6-8a NLV. 

Leave and live…leave parents and live with each other.

When Hope Rose From the Dead

Peeking through the curtain, I scanned the audience and hoped my entire family showed up.

I’d landed my first high-school role in the broadway musical, South Pacific.

Thankfully, my character as the island girl, Liat, called for a few speaking parts and no singing—not my strong suit.

With sweaty palms and a rush of adrenaline, I checked the seats again.

And if my people show up, would I make them proud when I took my final bow?

From side stage during the first scene, my gaze spotted them through the blinding light.

All my loved ones occupied the entire third row. They’re here, now break a leg.

Front-row Seats for When Hope Rose

I found my groove and remembered my few lines with no blunders. But my glory days as an actress ended soon after.

History also recounts a glory day when hope showed up…big. Over 2000 years ago, God set the stage for a story of hope to unfold.

The birth of the Christ-child took place in a lowly stable where animals occupied the front-row seats.

Unashamed: I Worship Jesus Christ

Unashamed.

Google defines it as “expressed or acting openly and without guilt or embarrassment.”

Embarrassed about my Lord and Savior? Never.

Oh I’m sure there were instances in the past when I held back or shied away from sharing my spiritual beliefs…from speaking the name of Jesus…from full disclosure of my life in Christ.

But you know what? Not anymore. Sure, I mess up, fail, and sin. So, I pray for a show-and-tell life. That my words tell others who I worship and my actions show others who I worship.

Still, sometimes we fall prey to the mindset that only church or “Christian” events or missions—where it’s “appropriate” and even expected—as the places for unashamed worship.

Unashamed in Life

Instead, it’s about out there in the real world, on the job, on social media, and amongst unbelievers—some may even be antagonistic toward Jesus and toward us.

Drag Along Regret or Run Free to God

Regret. 

Such a small word that packs a big punch. Often, a supersized punch to the gut. And it leaves us gasping for air and reeling in supercharged pain in our soul.

Regret is displayed in these ways: sorrow/sadness, repentance, disappointment or remorse for a missed opportunity.* 

In order to unpack the specifics about regret, let’s look at examples and Scriptures.

Sorrow & Regret

Sorrow over a great loss. Maybe a loved one’s death or a broken relationship.

The regret runs much deeper when both are involved. A loved one dies before restoration takes place in the relationship. I’ve seen this fleshed out at funerals. Sons and daughters or fathers and mothers or brothers and sisters who skipped the services because of a hurt or grievance. 

But this hits a little too close to home in my current situation. Someone in my extended family refuses to live at peace with me. Reconciliation, at least for now, is not the desired outcome for her. 

I pray and ask the Lord to humble my heart and help me continue to reach out. So regret is not my companion now or later.

Repentance & Regret

Past mistakes and sin keeps us chained to regret.

Shushed No More About Jesus

Shh…please be quiet!

Shushed. It happened in elementary school. And at the library.

My mom insisted I was quiet in church—the right thing to do. So, apparently the preacher could yell. But me? No freedom of speech from the pew. 

True, I didn’t have the floor or the stage.

As a child, I remember when grown-ups asked for a little peace and quiet. Perhaps for their sanity. 

Oh if we rewound the tape, there’s more examples of attempts to silence me. Instead, let’s fast-forward to present day.

Shushed No More

Now, I’m a woman. Sure, certain scenarios in life call for silence and no talking—“zip it.”

Like when my husband’s watching one of his favorite TV shows or wishes to hear something on the news. I get it. I need to hush.

But other shushing hits too close to home and my heart. Because attempts are made to silence my faith. Sometimes in the form of audible requests, and other times unheard voices but nonetheless real messages to shush.

But…my name is Karen Friday and I refuse to be quiet about my Lord.